Talking to your child about their life story
Downloadable resources
This section is here to support and guide you through the different stages and ages of supporting your child with their life story. There are a range of resources available to help you start talking to your child about their life story, keep the conversation going and revisiting those conversations as your child grows and develops throughout their life.
What is Life Story Work?
Life story work helps children understand their history, experiences and relationships, and how these form part of who they are today. It is an ongoing process that develops as a child grows, with information shared in an age-appropriate and sensitive way.
The sections below will guide you through the life story work process and help you support your child as their understanding, questions and needs change over time.
1. Starting the Conversation
Downloadable resources below:
- This Life Journey Ladder offers practical ideas for introducing age-appropriate Life Journey Work materials during your child’s early years, from birth to approximately six years old. It’s never too early to begin helping children understand their story, and introducing these conversations from a young age can encourage openness and understanding as they grow. Download: Baby Steps 0 to 6 (PDF)
- This guide offers practical advice and considerations to help you prepare for difficult conversations with your adopted child. It includes useful tips on how to approach sensitive topics, what to think about beforehand and how to create a supportive environment for these important discussions. Download: Before having difficult conversations (Word doc)
2. Keeping the conversation going
Downloadable resources below:
- This Life Journey Ladder provides guidance and practical ideas for using age-appropriate Life Journey Work materials throughout the teenage years. It also explores the changes taking place in the adolescent brain and body, and how these can influence an adopted young person’s developing identity.
Download: Teenage Life Journey Ladder (PDF)
- Talking to children and young people about difficult aspects of their birth family history or early experiences can be challenging. It can be hard to know what information is appropriate to share, when to share it and how to explain it in a way that children can understand.This resource offers practical guidance and suggested language to help you approach conversations about sensitive topics, including:
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Domestic abuse
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Drug and alcohol use
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Mental health difficulties
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Medical conditions
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Abuse and neglect
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Other difficult experiences that may form part of a child’s life story
Download: Telling Children Difficult Information (Word doc)
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3. Having conversations across the life course
Downloadable resources below:
- This presentation explores how children’s understanding of their life story develops at different ages and stages, drawing on Brodzinsky’s research. Download: A child’s understanding of their story – based on Brodzinsky research (Powerpoint)
- In this video, adoptive parent and Life Journey Work specialist Helen Oakwater discusses the importance of honesty when talking to children about their life journey and early experiences. Download: Helen Oakwater- Does lack of truth telling destabilise a child’s life journey (Word doc)
- This Life Journey Ladder provides ideas for age-appropriate Life Journey Work materials and guidance on when to introduce them, from birth through to 18 years of age. Download: Life Journey ladder English (PDF)
Life Journey Work Guide for Adopters
Downloadable resources below:
- This comprehensive guide supports adopters in understanding and undertaking Life Journey Work with their children. It explores the importance of Life Journey Work, different approaches to life story work and the resources available to help children understand their past, develop their identity and make sense of their experiences. Download: Life Journey Work Guide for Adopters (PDF)
