From an early age, Lowri, a solo adopter from Vale, Valleys and Cardiff Adoption realised that love didn’t have to be blood-related – and that family meant more than DNA. After babysitting for a family whose child was adopted, then 16-year-old Lowri knew she wanted to adopt. Now, Lowri, 35, is a mother and believes adopting her daughter was the best decision she has ever made.
This is Lowri’s story…
"I always knew that I wanted to adopt, but for me, the question was ‘When?’ After teaching in London for close to ten years, I decided to go travelling in my late 20s. When I returned, I intended to start the adoption process. At the time, I wasn't in a relationship, but I didn't want this to prevent me from starting a family so I continued to pursue this journey as a single adopter.
"My first call with with VVC adoption agency was in 2017 but I was renting at the time and on a year’s contract at work. To make sure I had more security for a child, I changed jobs and joined the civil service. I was put on a year’s probation, which is standard for the civil service, before being given a permanent contract - and for two years I thought about adopting a child, counting down the days until I could start the process again. For me, having a permanent contract and home was a personal choice, rather than something that you need to have before adopting.
"In August 2019, I passed my probation and made the call again to start my adoption journey. On a three day training session, I was the only solo adopter. I also struggled to find resources for solo adopters. However, my experience of adopting as a solo person has been very positive - and the support that I’ve had from social workers and health visitors has been incredible.
"When my daughter, now aged 3, came home in June 2020, my life changed forever. We both finally had what we’d been waiting for. For me, one of the most special moments was when we first met in person. She was in my arms before I even had a chance to put my bag down. Instantly, we had the most incredible bond and were matched perfectly.
"The first few days and weeks were overwhelming - and felt like a whirlwind. But I was, and still am, fortunate to have an incredible support network around me, including social workers, health visitors and also support from my family and friends who I was able to have as a support bubble during COVID-19.
"My journey hasn't always been easy and I’ve learned so much. I now have a great network of other solo adopters, who I meet up with to socialise and get advice from. This has been invaluable to my daughter's development as a family. I’m part of a solo adopter mums’ support group and I also have a big community of solo adopters on Instagram.
"My advice to anyone considering adopting on your own is to do your research so that you are prepared. I would also be really honest with yourself about what you can cope with, don’t feel guilty if you can’t take on more than one child if it’s not right for you and your situation. Make sure that you have a strong support network around you of family and friends. Finally, just go for it! It is the best decision that I have ever made and I have never looked back."
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